The machine is an old upright with a bag that needs to be periodically replaced. Its motor boasts a decibel level that might rival the roar of a Harley Davidson with straight pipes. Twice each weekday morning—first round at 5:15; second round at 5:45—the drone of the vacuum cleaner can be heard through the wall that separates us from our neighbors. Each session lasts about five minutes. The ritual is relentlessly predictable.
On weekend mornings, the familiar sound starts a first round nearer 9:00, and lasts closer to ten minutes. It then occurs periodically throughout the entire morning—both Saturday and Sunday—with a final round sometime in the early afternoon between 1:00 and 2:00. The number of sessions on the weekend seems to be directly tied to whether his wife is out or in. If she is out, he might indulge in the activity as many as six or more times. If she is in, he restrains himself to two, sometimes three rounds.
It is a puzzlement: this obsession with vacuuming. What could possibly have caused this compulsion? It might be best to not dwell on it too long.
We have seriously discussed buying him a new vacuum cleaner—maybe one with a quieter motor?
Copyright DJ Anderson, 2018
